Are you ready to really listen?

I was at an end of the summer gathering on Saturday night.  Lots of people were there.  Many I didn’t know and some I did.  As is usual for most people, I began talking first to the people I knew. 

I am an extrovert- let’s get that straight – so, I can talk to almost anyone.  I enjoy finding out details about people.  I enjoy the small exchanges between others and myself.  I would have to say though, in the past, I spoke more than I listened. 

Through my meditation, yoga work and spiritual readings I have been working on being quiet more.  I am a person who easily talks aloud, says things without thinking and can tell the wrong people too much information about myself.  My role as a teacher supports this talking and others constantly listening to what I say.  My ego is filled to the brim after a day at work!  Working on being quiet has taken many years.

Back at the party, I sat with some people I thought I knew and realized after listening that I never really knew them all that well.  I found out information that would have been helpful to me years ago but I was not ready to listen.  I truly believe that this was a set-up.  The Universe had set me up, again.  It brought these messages to me in the form of two human beings.  The messages were of the Divine.  And maybe the Universe had tried to give me these messages before but I was not listening.

Port Wing, WI, Lake Superior (CMG original)

How can we be quieter inside and out?  That is the question I pose today.  How can we truly listen to one another and hear the powerful voice of the Universe?  Each of us are just messengers designed to carry powerful, needed messages to move one another along.  What message might you have missed by not fully being present?  Of course, it will come up again because that is how this all shakes out.  As humans we enter into this play with many scenes, some scenes repeat themselves maybe with different players but with the same moral lesson until the play comes to an end and maybe, just maybe in some of the scenes we have found resolution.

My hope for you today is that you can find resolution to some of your scenes through listening.  Listen and be open to the people or circumstances that you encounter today.  What messages do they bring?  How might they be bringing you closer to the new scene?  To peace.

Namaste,

Carrie

Light your fire- get unstuck- step into the unknown!

I have been feeling a bit stuck.  There are days (like the last couple) that I have had to choose between sleep and writing.  My day goes so much better when I am able to have my morning routine of quiet, meditation, chai and contemplation.  But, my body/mind overtakes this need for awake/quiet time and says "you need sleep".  So, instead of getting up at 4:00 or 5:00 AM the last couple of days, I have slept in until 6:00 AM.  This allows me only the minimum amount of time to pray and get myself dressed and ready for my work day.

The weekdays can make me feel stuck.  I am able to do my job, care for my children, maybe care a bit for my home, do a little bit of caring for myself and the end.

Wednesday I did something out of the norm and went to an improv show with my college roommate.  First off, there is nothing like going out with your college roommate (if you liked her or him) because they know so much about you, you have history and that bonds you forever.  Secondly, doing something different like that in my week made me enjoy my week and made me feel unstuck.  I laughed like I haven't laughed in a while.  It was so therapeutic!  Also, going to this theatre reminded me of my first love...theater.  Why have I stopped doing it?  I was a theatre major.  As a child, when anyone ever asked me what I was going to be when I grew up I would respond, "an actress".  Bringing something like that back into my life might be just what I need.

Iron Pour (CMG original)- Step into the fire- into the unknown!

What do you need?  Has there been something in your life that you used to love that you don't do anymore?  How can you start doing that?  How can you surround yourself with people who would support this endeavor?

The oracle card I picked today was Freyja, who said, "Unleash your adventurous side!  Take risks and be daring!"

And so it shall be.  We go into the unknown together and I support you!

Namaste, Carrie

“Oz never did give nothing to the Tin Man that he didn’t already have.”

“A heart is not judged by how much you love; but by how much you are loved by others”

― L. Frank Baum, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz

“You have plenty of courage, I am sure," answered Oz. "All you need is confidence in yourself. There is no living thing that is not afraid when it faces danger. The true courage is in facing danger when you are afraid, and that kind of courage you have in plenty.”

― L. Frank Baum, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz (Books of Wonder)

Maybe, like many of you, I enjoy listening to music as I drive my car from place to place.  I have a wide variety of songs stored in my phone, everything from Rihanna to Frank Sinatra.  I like to sing while I drive and it amazes me at how many lyrics I know by memory.

Some of the ones that I know by heart are old songs from my childhood and at times these stir the deepest emotions.  Songs can bring up memories of people, places and things that were connected to that time.  Songs can make me laugh.  Songs can make me cry.  In fact, I have created a list of songs that are entitled, “My Crying Songs” (I’ll share that list with you another time).  There are some songs that I dislike because of the situation it reminds me of. 

Yesterday, as I was stuck in traffic, the song “Tin Man” by America came one and a line from the song made me take pause. 

“Oz never did give nothing to the Tin Man that he didn’t already have.”

That is the story, isn’t it?  The story of all the main characters of the Wizard of Oz; Dorothy, the Lion, the Scarecrow and the Tin Man.  They all wanted something, something that they felt they were lacking inside themselves.  The Lion wanted courage yet he proved over and over that he was the most courageous one of them all.  The Scarecrow wanted the Wizard to give him a brain while during their adventures he repeatedly solves the group’s problems.  The Tin Man wants a heart but is the kindest and most feeling character in the story.  Dorothy wants to go “somewhere over the rainbow” or “to a place where I won’t get into trouble” and yet when she does, she realizes that ‘her hearts desire is in her own backyard and that if it isn’t there, she never really had it to begin with.’

We can all learn something from this story by Frank Baum.  We all have what we need INSIDE of us.  The Universe has supplied us with everything.  We lack nothing.  Some of us just need an adventure like Dorothy had in order to remind ourselves that this is the truth.  And many a time, that is what life gives us, that adventure, that drama and we have to weave our way down the yellow brick road, encounter a witch or two to find out that we are right where we are suppose to be.  We have everything that we think we lack.  Trust in the Universe, in your Higher Power, in God. 

Today, say a prayer and ask the Universe to release you from your negative thoughts and into the positive, abundance- filled thinking that will bring you closer to all that is.  This is your authentic self, this is your true path.  Ask: “When I become confused, frustrated or when I start going down that yellow brick road, please bring me back, show me YOUR way, let me trust You and know that I lack nothing.”

Remember "There's no place like home."

Namaste.

Boundaries- good ways of caring for yourself.

Franconia Sculpture Park, Franconia, MN (CMG original)

I am working on my boundaries.  I grew up knowing absolutely nothing about them so as I moved through adolescence and into adulthood, I had nary a model as how to separate myself from the people whom I loved and their abusive behaviors. 

For many, many years I tried to “fix” those people.  I would attach myself to people that I thought needed fixing.  I just knew in my soul that I could help them if only they would let me.  I instinctively knew that I had healing powers but I didn’t know how to take care of myself and not allow others to suck that energy right from me, because they will, you know.  They don’t mean to but it’s like the mosquito who cannot help being attracted to the light and then ultimately to its death. 

So, I’m working on this.  You may be too.  The greatest “ahHA” moment was when I found the key. 

The key to boundaries is that YOU get to decide what they are and set them and then YOU get to work on yourself! The pressure of trying to change someone else and the failed result is gone!  It never works see because you CAN’T change anyone else, you can only change yourself.

By working on yourself, you become infections. The phrase, “lead by example” comes to mind, or “actions speak louder than words”.  People you come into contact with feel your strong, calm energy.  They can sense that you are not going to be pulled into the drama.  When you stop interacting with drama-filled people, they get bored.  “What, no drama?” they say and after awhile they move on.  There is nothing in it for them anymore.  You have maintained your boundaries.  And yes, setting boundaries means, at times, letting go.

Here are 3 basic steps to setting boundaries:

1. Focus on yourself.  Your spouse, your child, your mom or dad are going to do what they are going to do.  You can suggest, criticize, nag and complain all you want but all you are doing is taking the focus OFF of yourself.  Bring it back to you.  What can you do for yourself?

2. Release your worries and concerns about those people to the Universe.  Know that they have their own path.  They have lessons to learn and the Universe will provide those lessons and care for them.  Meditate and/or pray.

3. Get support.  If you need help on how to set boundaries, join a group like Al-Anon, see a therapist, buy a book like, Co-Dependent No More by Melody Beattie.

It is hard work to un-learn old patterns of behavior but it is not impossible.  Remember, in every moment you have a choice.  You can choose to say “no”.  You can choose to remain happy.  You can choose to care for yourself.  And remember…we are all doing the best we can in every given moment.

Namaste,

Carrie

We All Just Want to Be Loved- go easy on judgments

St. Paul, MN - Ordway Dance Series (CMG original)

“When you see people only as personalities, rather than souls with life missions to fulfill, you forever limit the growth and possibilities of what God has in store for another person.”

― Shannon Alder

“Sometimes your light shines so bright that it blinds people from seeing who you really are.”

― Shannon Alder

“Worry less about what other people think about you, and more about what you think about them.” -Fey Weldon

I have been thinking about judgments.  My brain is constantly sorting and categorizing.  That is what it does best.  It assesses a situation.  Judges it for safety.  It has kept me alive.  Good, bad, right, wrong…is there a car coming, is the water too hot?  I have survived because I have made good judgments so there is a time and place for the brain.  What prompted me to think more deeply about this recently was a Wii game.  You know the Wii it is a gaming device, a bit like the Xbox but the Wii  targeted movement.  Wii Sports, Wii Fit. 

For Christmas this year I got a game for the Wii.  “Leela” by Deepak Chopra.  It is now September and I just put it in the Wii last night.  You see, I hardly ever play on the Wii, I don’t find myself in my living room sitting on the couch all that much and I hadn’t found the time to play this game until now.  Before I opened it, I found myself placing a judgment on it as well and asking questions, “What is this game?”, “Meditation on the TV?”  “That is not TRUE meditation.”

Then, I played “Leela” (which is the Sanskrit word that means “play”) and found it truly wonderful!  I sat and silently meditated with it for 7 minutes.  I focused on my breathing with some beautiful background music.  I reviewed the charkas.  As I was doing this, my thirteen year old came in the room and said he wanted to play.  Great!  My thirteen year old is going to meditate, nothing wrong with that.  He wants to try to plant the trees and get them to grow in the sunlight, cool! 

It was then that I had another ahHA moment.  We are all not Tibetan monks in a small village in the mountains.  Some of us live in busy cities, in rural farmhouses, in suburban sprawl.  It’s all good!  My judgments led me to believe that meditation or stillness could not occur through a TV, through a Wii but who am I to judge?  Maybe it can.  Maybe if a few more people bought “Leela”, the world would be a more peaceful place.

Yes, we judge.  We are human. But let that not be an excuse to do so.  Just for today, where can you let go of some of those judgments?  How are those judgments limiting you?  What judgments are you placing on yourself?  Can you let go of ONE and set yourself free?   

You are here for a reason- machines don’t come with extra parts!

Franconia Sculpture Park, Franconia, MN (CMG original)

We watched the movie “Hugo” the other night.  I had watched it on the big screen and thoroughly enjoyed it so when we were looking for a film to add to our collection, we decided on “Hugo”.  Since I had viewed it before, I decided to multi-task and enter in some data on my computer while I watched.  There were moments in the film though that made me stop, pause and listen.  The words that were being spoken were profound and came from a higher source.

Hugo (an orphan who is abandoned by his only living relative, a drunk uncle, who’s job it was to keep the clock in the train station running) is standing on top of the clock he repairs at the train station.  He is looking out over Paris with the girl he has befriended, his only friend and states:

“I'd imagine the whole world was one big machine. Machines never come with any extra parts, you know. They always come with the exact amount they need. So I figured, if the entire world was one big machine, I couldn't be an extra part. I had to be here for some reason. And that means you have to be here for some reason, too.”

WOW!  That is it!  Our lives have meaning.  You have a purpose! 

Sometimes, it is difficult to know or see what that purpose is.  You may be in a unfulling job or a less than perfect relationship.  You feel underappreciated and overworked.  Your children may not have turned out like you expected.   All lifes little and big rocks and pits have you wondering...”why am I here?”

I have a mentor in my life and I remember saying to her in my late twenties, “I don’t know what my purpose is, what am I suppose to do with my life?”  She responded, “You ARE doing it.”  I didn’t get it.  I didn’t get it for years and still I struggle with where I am right now, wondering if I am in the place I should be.  I have plans, dreams, I want to move forward!  I realize that these are all ego-based projections.  What I need to work on is being in the present moment.   Because, whether you know it or not, what you are doing right now IS your purpose. 

The 6th limb of yoga is dharana- learning to focus the mind.  In yoga, we do this through meditation and in hatha yoga, through postures and breathing.  If we can practice staying in the present moment, letting go of time, we can then,  let go of fear which says “you don’t have a purpose” or “what IS your purpose”. 

As you move down your spiritual path, you might discover that things just happen.  You meet who you are suppose to meet.  Things line up for you in just the right way.  They may come about this way out of hardship or difficulty but things happen.  Things happen because of your choices in the present moment.  Moment to moment we can choose.  And in this moment we can choose peace.  We can choose to remain patient.  We can choose to leave a situation that is not serving us.  We can choose to stay with our breath through a difficult posture.  We can choose to practice dharana and focus on the now knowing that you have a purpose and that the world is one big machine with no extra parts!

In order to get inside you must get OUTside.

South shore of Lake Superior- Gunnar's paw prints (CMG original)

I woke up today after sleeping 11 hours!  Yep, 11.  I felt like I could have slept more.  I was TIRED! I have been working 8-12 hours a day.  I have been waking up every 4 hours to give our son with the broken elbow his pain medication. I have also been on the verge of the first school-year cold.  So, sleeping was exactly what I needed. 

The other thing I could tell was that my body needed some outdoor time.  When I woke up, I thought about how much I would love to go camping at a local state park and spend the weekend out in nature.  At the end of the week, I spoke to a friend who wanted to get together.  She suggested brunch and I suggested a walk with our dogs.  I am inside a building in a room without windows for 6+ hours during the week.  I love this time of year and I want to be outdoors!  Cool nights, warm days, leaves starting to change colors- there is nothing like it- fall in the northland.   So, it didn’t surprise me when the oracle card I picked this morning said, “spend more time outdoors”.

Spending time in nature can help to get to the root of your being.  It can help relieve stress and relax your mind.  The other thing that getting out in nature can do is tire you out!  A brisk walk among some trees, near a lake, breathing in fresh air, gets your heart pumping, your lungs expanding and your muscles receive more oxygen.  I witnessed first hand what happens when you do far too much couch surfing.

Friday, we took students to the Minnesota Zoo.  It is a fairly large zoo where the animals are in as natural of an environment as they can be.  These students range in age from 14-18.  They are inner city youth who live mostly in poverty.  We walked, mostly outside for 3 hours- taking breaks along the way.  After about an hour, they were done.  Pleas to sit, to go inside, to GO BACK TO SCHOOL, were like a cacophony of crickets on a summer night.  We urged them on.  When we finally did get back to school, many students literally collapsed on the floor.  This was good.  My thought was, we should do this more often.  Their brains were stimulated, their bodies were stimulated and my guess is they had a great nights sleep. 

Especially those of us that live in urban areas have to make it a priority to find nature, to get to a river, a lake or a pond.  To find the local park with trees and breathe in the oxygen they provide for us.  Being in nature will help you to vibrate at a higher energy level and give you more clarity to the circumstances in your life.  If you live in a rural area, make sure you focus on the nature around you and not the tasks at hand for a bit of time every day.  Even if we live in nature on a regular basis, we may not actually BE present.  Slowly breathe in and out as you walk, ride your horse, run.  Notice the leaves, the sand, the water, how they move, lay still, grow effortlessly.  If you notice that you start to plan your day or make your lists, recognize it and then bring your attention back to your breathing.  Your breath and your body are all that you need focus on. 

Make a commitment to yourself today to get outside!  Put it on your calendar.  Schedule time to commune with nature and nurture your inside by getting outside.